8AM: What’s wrong with you? It’s the holidays. I’m catching up on sleep.
9AM: I’m having breakfast. Give me an hour.
10AM: Oh no! We missed the 8am class.
11AM: I’m now too busy discussing/arguing with my wife about why we didn’t get to the 9am session.
12:30PM: Lunch. Can’t do yoga while you’re eating. You might spill something on your mula bandha.
1:30PM: Digesting lunch. Mindfully. Om.
3PM: Having grandpa nap.
4PM: You know what? I just don’t feel like yoga right now. You can’t force yourself to do yoga.
5PM: Which class to do? Yin? Ashtanga? Kundalini? Can’t decide. Miss next class.
6PM: Yoga is all about not judging. So don’t judge me for not doing yoga. 6:30PM: I’ve already had a drink. Can’t do yoga now. Yoga needs a clear head.
7PM: Drunk now. Om, baby, om!
7:45PM: Discussing how good yoga is. It’s honestly amazing.
9PM: We should get up early and do yoga together.
9:01PM: Okay, let’s set the alarm for 5.
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Tim Elliott is a features and investigations journalist for The Sydney Morning Herald.